It's a 'Family Tradition'.....now

What up Cardinal Nation! Today is Opening Day for The St. Louis Cardinals, and in true traditional form~I am off work Today and Tomorrow. You know..a day to party and then a day to recoup.

I haven't missed an Opening Day since I was like 18. I didn't even miss last year when I was pregnant. See?



Side Note #1: That's a Busch N.A. in my hand. A FAKE beer. I was preggers, silly!

Side Note #2: When tagging this post, I realized I already had a 'Cards' label saved...so if you'd like to read more about my Pregnant Party last year..you can read it in my April 13th, 2010 post. Since I can't link to anything, I have to direct you that way.
Side Note #2a SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME link to things. I see the 'insert link' button...but it doesn't put it in my blog! :(

Side Note #3 On the topic of my fun shirt~that child was/is sure to be a fan for life. At 7 weeks old we took him to a game. Let me repeat. S.e.v.e.n. W.e.e.k.s O.l.d. *See photo op below* We did this b/c we had the good fortune of having a Suite to sit in, without having to bother with the elements, or crowded seats. Little Lucky Duck!~~speaking of which, his second game that he will attend before he is ONE is mid-April..and we have Redbird Club tickets for that.~~ Suite and Club tickets?!?!...eh, I don't think you can be spoiled when it comes to sports.



For those wondering about the baby and today--we are having a "Date-Day", and P.J. will be spending the day with his grand-parents.

So anyway...back to the tradition part of this whole blog. I haven't missed one Opening Day since highschool---and my husband and I haven't missed one since we started dating in 2006.....ya know, (or maybe you don't) the year The Redbirds won the World Series!! So, needless to say-we are pumped for this party. A tradition that we've vowed to never miss. Rain or Shine (which are both in the forecast!)

I'll post some pics from the craziness that is sure to exist a tad later.

And Ya, it's THAT important for us to be amongst the sea of Red and White. To party with the diehards. To just be.



Where will you be?

~Happenings~

Feels like forever since I've last blogged!
I don't really have shit to talk about, but I guess I will.

I'm bored right now. The baby (shout-out to his 3-week birthday!!) is sleeping in his new swing that we just splurged on, and at the moment the hubster is studying to learn grocery item (that don't have bar codes) register code numbers. It's ridiculous really. I never realized how many different types of Apples there are.

He quit his job at the bike shop b/c they couldn't pay him on time, or at all sometimes. So he took a job opening with my father's company, but on the labor side of the business, not a desk job-like my dad. Not P's ideal situation, desk or not, but with a new baby, we needed a good paying, steady paycheck gig. His first day was today, and successful. A week ago, this grocery store called him back after passing on him a few months back and said that they believe they had made a mistake. So, after finishing up his time with the bike shop, starting a new job with my dad, then waiting on the go-ahead for this grocery manager gig--(then having to quit my dad's job if it does pan out), AND HAVING A 3 WEEK OLD BABY~~our lives have been chaotic-to say the least. Oh ya, and we've tried to get our social life back since that was missing for 9 months. ;)

But, that's how I survive. I'm a chaotic, non-stop, ADD inflicted person. I bore easily, need excitement. The hubby, however, is all out of wack. We work well b/c he is so even keel, and I'm not. He isn't used to stress, ever. So for him, he's just sick of the in-between situation. He wants all his ducks in a row and life to be smooth. BORING! :)

Anyhow, P believes he has memorized these apple numbers...guess I'll quiz him and have a couple beers. Peace blog-world.

Happy Birthday to Me from P!!!

So, I had to celebrate my birthday in the hospital, as my main man was born 2 days prior to my b-day. The hubster hooked me up with this cruiser that I've been eyeing for a long time now. I was only able to see it in the catalog and he just brought it home tonight. Check it out.

I'mma be "cruisin' down the street, smokin' endo, sippin' on gin and juice...laaaid back"

Check out the pinkness that this bike is, the flower accents, the dice valve caps, the wide handle bars and of course...the white walls. I'm so excited to pull the little one around on this pimp mobile!!

We shall call you...PJ

Here is the crazy (for us at least) story of our boy's birth.



Saturday evening, the 25th, and continuing into Sunday morning, the 26th, I began experiencing some major contractions. For about 4 hours (10pm-2am) they stayed 10 mins apart, so we decided to just wait them out at home until they got a little closer. By 3am they had spread back out to about 20 minutes apart and I was able to get some much needed sleep.

Sunday morning when I woke up the contractions still felt strong, but not close enough together to worry. I spoke to my OB and she said that I could stay home, go about my day as usual and report to the hospital at 8pm that night as we had scheduled, to be induced.
And that is just what we did...we went about our normal activities. We went to a 5 year old's birthday party and I just dealt with the contractions as nothing were happening. We made it home from the party with a couple of hours to spare, so I showered, and double-checked my hospital bag, packed the car and we hit the road about 7:15pm.

We had high hopes that I wouldn't have to be induced since I was having contractions all weekend. Boy were we right! At exactly 8pm I was hooked up to the fetal monitors. One to monitor my contractions, and one to monitor the baby's heart rate. Not long after being hooked up, the R.N. checked to see how far I was dialated. I was already dialated 5 CM!!!

Not long after that, though, the R.N. and numerous other doctors noticed on the baby's monitor that it's heart rate would drop very low during my contractions, and then raise to normal levels when I wasn't contracting. They decided to lay me all sorts of different ways on the bed to take some pressure off of the ambilical cord. I was also hooked up to an oxygen tank to send the baby more oxygen. They said that my contracting uterus was applying pressure on the ambilical cord, cutting off flow to the baby. Eventually they attached monitors to the baby itself, inside of me, to get a more accurate heart rate.

Pretty damn scary stuff considering we hadn't been at the hospital for longer than an hour and a half and all this was happening so fast. I was given medicine through my IV to stop my contractions to monitor the baby's heart rate on it's own, and everything was fine. It was just when I was contracting that the baby had a tough time recovering.

At some point during this fiasco the nurse told me that my best bet, at the time being, was to get an epidural, considering the fact that I may have to be rushed into an emergency c-section.

So now, at 5 cm dialated, my contractions have been halted, an epidural has been given, and now pitocin was to be given to start my contractions up again. All of course, while the baby's heart rate being monitored by a zillion nurses. (or so it seemed) Patrick and I sat around listening the baby's heart rate at a nice, fast, consistent pace (which at times put us to sleep) only to be terrified when we heard a lag in between beats. Remember, I can not feel my contractions now, so I had no idea when the baby was having a hard time recovering unless I heard the inconsistent beats. Not fun. We would hear the lag, sit up, look at eachother and wait for the dr.'s to come rushing in.

We had to do this for FIVE hours until about 2:30 in the morning when my OB called and gave me two options.

1.) Continue with how things were going, but realizing that the hardest part of birth on a baby is the actual delivery. If it couldn't handle contractions at this point, it would be very stressful during the delivery.

OR

2.) Prepare for a C-Section.

I didn't even ask my husband, I found out later, I just made the executive decision to have a C-section. There was no way I was going to put my baby at anymore risk than it was already enduring.

We called family members at 2:30, telling them to hurry on up b/c the Dr.'s weren't waiting. Daddy got dressed in his hospital scrubs and the Dr.'s upped my epidural dose and off we went to the surgery room. HERE GOES NOTHING!! :)

My arms were laid out flat, pointing directly out. They put warm towels on them, and I was given little nose oxygen plugs. They hoisted a tarp in front of my face and my OB began her procedure. The epidural is no joke. I couldn't stay awake. The lights were too bright, I was struggling to STAY AWAKE DURING THE BIRTH OF MY CHILD. Seriously?? I made daddy talk to me so I could stay awake. He really helped out!

I think the whole C-Section process took about 20-25 minutes. Daddy got to announce the sex of the baby to all of the doctors and to me. We have a baby BOY!!

Picutres were taken, tears were shed. What a surreal experience!
Our perfectly healthy, 8lb 5oz, 20.5 inch baby boy was born at 3:33am!!

We Love You PJ!!

***Editor's Note** My OB had to wait until delivery to inspect what could have been happening to my abilical cord when the baby's heart rate was dropping. She said that my ambilical cord was thin and old (I guess b/c I was 9 days late), and that not everyone experiences the complication that we did, but that it isn't that uncommon.***

Holy Busy Batman

Hi everyone!! Another boring, up-to-date blog...

Friday was our World Cup Friday...my family & P's brother all took off work to get together and celebrate the fact that the US, Germany, and England all played on the same day. The party started at 6:30 am and didn't end until about 4pm...we crashed pretty early, considering we started pretty early! Even though I didn't drink a drop, I was ex-hau-sted!!!--and don't get me started on the terrible officiating that we witnessed ALL DAY!

Saturday the hubby worked and then we celebrated Father's Day on his family's side. Patrick threw his back out at work so that put a little kink in the fun to be had, but he made due and we had a really nice evening...with some kick-ass grub compliments of his mama.

Sunday was our busiest day, if you can believe it. He and I were celebrating our 1-year wedding anniversary, to which we went out for a fancy lil' breakfast at FirstWatch, then we really started the partying by grocery shopping!! :) We were supposed to hit up babys r us too, to finish up buying the rest of the items on our registry, but due to his back being in worse shape than the day prior, we just came home and vegged out in bed watching soccer...and I wouldn't have wanted to celebrate our mark in history any other way! 1 o'clock rolled around and we headed over to my parent's house to have champagne and eat our cake--(cheesecake still as delicious as the day we got married), then we celebrated my sister's 25th birthday, then we jumped into the Father's Day celebration for Pops. Whew!! We literally lit candles on one cake, and moved onto the next...pretty funny actually. Patrick and My sister were supposed to have a soccer game too that evening, (I'm out, you know, b/c I'm prego), but we didn't have to worry about that b/c of his back....and the game ended up being cancelled anyhow due to lack of players. I mean, who schedules a game on a holiday?!

Luckily, Patrick was able to see my Uncle today, (a chiropractor) and has another appointment tomorrow. Even though my Uncle retired about a year ago, he has the whole setup in his home, so it's a pretty sweet deal for us. And, while one doctor told Patrick he would need back surgery--something Patrick's father had at a fairly young age--my uncle believes that getting him adjusted, corrected, and on a regular chiro schedule, he will survive~~without going under the knife. Let's hope this 'voodoo that he do' works! The timing couldn't be worse, and how scary having such an invasive procedure done so early in life?!

So that's what we've been up to. I am on the countdown for this baby, 4 weeks left! Went to the Dr. today, to be told that while my cervix is soft, I am not dialated in the least bit. I will be "on-time or late" the doctor told me. Yippeee...here's hoping this 95 degree weather keeps up!! ;)

Hope everyones been keeping busy themselves!!

Back from a hiatus

Hello blog-world. Been awhile, and if anyone missed us, I apologize! There hasn't been a shortage of blog-material happening, that's for sure, but there's been a shortage of time, and a shortage of will. I will recap a few of the highlighted moments that have been happening, but I tell ya what...We may not continue this blog much longer, I think we have more fun living life, rather than writing about it. I suppose if I participated in the 'Wordless Wednesdays' and 'Thankful Thursdays', etc., then I would have a desire to hop online and have some fun...so maybe I'll begin doing that. I just usually take to facebook to quickly summarize each day...so who knows...we will see.

**Two Saturdays ago (5-15-10) we had my baby shower at my mom's house, thrown by my mom, sister, and MIL. It was a success I'd say! (A few pictures to follow) It started at 1pm and ended at 1am. Although, I had to disappear and TRY to nap around 10:30pm, finally getting fed up with my father and his sound system, I left to head home around 12:45. I simply couldn't stay awake any longer!! We got a ton of great presents and I'd say that being surprised by the sex definitely worked in our benefit...we received every big-ticket item that we desired plus a TON (read:FOUR) handmade blankets, 2 diaper cakes, and our personal fav, some little soccer shoes!! All in All, we had a blast and I loved sharing it with our closest friends!

**Patrick recently received a nice raise at work, FINALLY, although that hasn't hindered his efforts to get a different, 9-5 gig...but for the time being, the timing couldn't be better!!!

**I am officially 32 weeks pregnant, which leaves us 8 to go!!! Whoo Hooo!!! I simply cannot wait. It's no secret that for me, pregnancy isn't the funnest event around, so I will be sooo happy when we have our little friend in our hands to hold...but daydreaming, and feeling the little one all day long will suffice for now :)

**We had to call the local police recently for the first time in our lives, over a domestic assault situation courtesy of our White Trash neighbors. Sigh. Knowing a policeman on the force is helpful, but it is RIDICULOUS how much power they really don't have. She won't leave him, or press charges and there's nothing the police can do. Awesome. So happy to be raising a child in this environment. Thankfully they are only renters and I'm working every avenue to have them evicted. Wish us luck.

Okay...I'm thinking that's a nice quick recap of some things that have been happening on the homefront. I will try to keep this blog up-to-date, I know so many of you are anticipating our next entry! HaHa!! Have a great Memorial Day Weekend everyone!! Due to Patrick's work schedule, St. Louis' summer heat wave, and sleeping conditions, we are unable to participate in the camping festivites with our friends this year. We will miss that so much. But however you chose to celebrate, have fun and be careful out there!!!

Some Quick Things

Okay, lots on my mind, and I think I'll feel better getting it out!

~~Tomorrow I am 27 weeks!! That seems so close. And so far away. AAHHH. Also, it seemed to have been going a little quicker before, but now we've just reached a stand-still. I'm guessing that's because we are super anticipative. (Is that a word?) So time always crawls in those situations.

~~Patrick finally felt the baby kick this week! It's so fun. He would leave his hand on my belly in the evenings while winding down and as soon as he'd remove it, BOOM, KICK/PUNCH! And so now he says the baby is stubborn like it's mama. :( :) Whatev!

~~Monday we are sitting with the photographer to finalize our wedding album. Finally! With the selling of the house (read: TRYING) and the baby and yada yada, I never took action, but we've picked our prints and hope to see an almost-finished album next week!

~~My Friend Anna, over-there on the left of the page (Companion to the Wind)...((I can't link!!!) has asked once and reminded me once to get my Ultrasound pics emailed out/posted to our group of friends. DUH! Soooo, I wrote it on a post-it (that I didn't invent) and will make the hubster set up our scanner TONIGHT!!! I will do this mama, promise!!

~~The weather here in the Lou has been amazing, so we really enjoyed ourselves last night BBQ'n with our good friends, Z and N. Over-there on the left of the page (Life of a Flat Foot Floozy)...((I can't link!!--HELP)) I can't wait for more summer BBQ's with good people!

~~I'm trying to get better with leaving blog love (comments) and tonight after work I left TWO comments on TWO blogs, (that I can't link to) and they didn't show up. BUMMER!!!

~~I think that's it...we've got some family-time to be catchin' up on this weekend, so Saturday, My mama's house, then Sunday, His mama's house. I'm sure I'll have a nice blog on Sunday!!

***EDITORS NOTE*** There will be no Ultrasound scanning work tonight. We got kicked outta the house for a showing, so our evening plan was thrown a curveball. Maybe tomorrow!!!

Until Then.

Checkin' In...

Whoa! It's so hard to blog. I didn't realize how busy I am. I suppose if my company didn't block blogger, then I could keep up more. I'm a crappy blogger, and a crappy commenter. I am just crap. ;) My apologies!!

Tonight we relaxed and bbq'd and I was able to take a few more pics of our baby's room's progress. Pictures of the gorgeous view off of our deck are attached too. I Love Spring!!

~~Note: The walking stick that is shown below has a cute-to-us story. I'd like to share. About 2 years ago, Patrick and I were on one of our many walks together through a local park. We had recently experienced a storm that had knocked lots of loose branches off of the trees along the path. I fell in love with one of them. Claiming that I could wrap tons of different types of fabric all around it and make it a festival-walking stick. (I saw some diiirty hippie dude with one at Rothbury and really wanted to make one of my own) Patrick was right when he said it would be too heavy to carry as a walking stick, and he wasn't too keen on the idea of carrying this stick around for the rest of our walk, and though I begged, literally, I got over it. We continued on...no stick in tow.

Two days later I came home to THE STICK. He got in his truck, retraced our path, found my stick and brought it home. (I love him!) So, walking stick idea out...we decided to save the stick and coat the puppy in about 6 coats of polyurithane. (My parents have a log that is also polurithaned that is special to them) Now the stick was perserved for a lifetime. But we didn't know what to do with it, so it was a corner piece in our living room for awhile. Now that the baby's sex is going to be a surprise, and we've decided on a Nature Theme for it's room, the stick makes perfect sense to be a staple in that room. Check out how the hubster purchased some twine, and hung this baby...for the baby!!

Gorgeous Spring Afternoon here in the Midwest!

Guest Blog #6 "Hope everyone had a great easter"

Hello everyone, we hope you had a great easter with your families, I cut my nose shaving, and friends. We had a great day, this post is a little late so most of you have forgot about easter by now but I am a busy guy and sometimes I forget to do things. There is no reason you need to re-read the first sentence because I am going to ellaborate on the embarassing situation that unfolded 15 minutes before we had to be at church.
So there I was, shaving my mug like all men have to do or have had to do at one time. It seems easy enough since I have been shaving since the sixth grade, you would think that I would have mastered it by now. I guess I got cocky, as I was finishing up I saw a couple of repelling ropes hanging from my nose, you may refer to them as nose hair. Instead of doing the smart thing, which would be reach into the closet were I have the exact tool to take care of these eye magnets, I decided to stick the straight razor up my shnoz and start chopping away. As I was taking the curves of my nose like a formula 1 racer all of a sudden i pulled the razor out along with a stream of blood. Now, I thought I cut the inside. Nope I cut the EFFing tip of my Effing nose. What The Shit? So as we are scrambling to get to church I have blood dripping off the end of my nose, not a good situation. Picture yourself, your husband, or your boy friend with those little pieces of toilet paper on their face where they have cut themselves shaving. Now picture me, with said piece of toilet paper on the tip of my EFing nose. Eventually it stopped bleeding and Easter was fine but sometimes I feel like I should kick my own ass for being dumb. Good thing I'm not limber. Don't mind the spelling or typos I didn't proof read it and Kelly (sp) is slaving for the man, so she can't correct my mistakes.

I am a Fool

Happy April Fool's Day ya'll!! I love love love this day. Or at least I used to when I was younger. It feels I'm too busy for such non-sense now. Ba-humbug! I didn't even think of anyone to punk today. Makes me sad. I was totally aware of jokes being played on other people, so it's not as if I just 'forgot' about the day.

Perhaps I just have too much trust placed in my husband.

Dumb.

I need to fill you guys in real quick on what the topic of our texts is about exactly, and because I know that none of you know who Gary is, I will explain. Gary is a mouse that Patrick found in his shop's trashcan a little over a week ago. (Patrick names all animals Gary, as a funny aside). Anyhow, Somehow this critter managed to get onto Patrick's workbench and fall into the trashcan. Patrick heard some rumbling around and found Gary. They hung out all day, and Patrick even fed his little buddy some chips that he had for lunch. (Sad, I know) Anyhow, at the end of the day, Patrick freed his little buddy in some brush behind his building and that was the last we'd know of Gary.

Until today.
Here are the text messages exchanged between Patrick and I this morning.

Patrick: Gary's back, and he brought a friend.

Me: OMG! TWO in the shop? GROSS. R u sure it's the same one?

Patrick: How am I supposed to know?

Me: Well u said. You can't have them run around ur store, customers will freak out! Maybe now you will clean that shop.

Patrick: Suck it. They're in the trashcan.

Me: Unreal. How do they get in, and then go to the trashcan? Weird. BUT what if they run out while someones in the store? What if they make babies?

Patrick: I need mousetraps.

Me: Don't kill 'em.

Patrick: Oh, let me get my flute and I'll serinade them out like the pied piper.

Me: He He.

FIFTEEN MINUTES PASS.

Patrick: I smashed them with a hammer.

Me: OMG. You r evil and disgusting. I can't believe it.

Me: Swear?

Patrick: mm hmmm

Patrick: APRIL FOOL'S! HA HA HA HA HAAAA!

Me: OMG. I hate you even more. At least I have a blog topic now, butt.

Patrick: I let them outside. But if I see more than 3 at once i'm getting traps.

Me: Fair.



AND THAT, my friends, is a normal day at the office between he and I. I love this kid...but he gets me everytime.

Anyone have a funny April Fool's story--I'd love to hear it!!

Guest Blog #5 "St. Patrick's Day To-Do List"

This being one of my favorite holidays and being part Irish, over the years I have compiled a check list of things I must accomplish on St. Patrick's Day. Actually, from the parade on Saturday up until St. Paddy's Day. You're probably wondering what criteria a holiday must have to be one of my favorites. It's easy, lots of drinking and lots of eating. So here goes the list of St. Me Day accomplishments, feel free to compare it to your own and/or read it with an Irish accent:

1. Participate in a parade run. Check

2. Drink my weight in Guiness. Check

3. Eat enough corned beef and cabbage/ruebens to fumigate an office building with my ass. Check. Sorry Kelly (sp)

4. Talk with an Irish accent until I annoy even myself. Check

5. When someone asks "How you doin'?" Reply, "Irish I were drunker". Check

6. Watch Boondock Saints (I & II) and wish I was one of the brothers. Check

7. Pretend I know the words to O' Danny Boy and sing it loudly. Check

8. Dig out all of the St. Paddy's Day garb for the wifey. Check

And best of all:
9. Get really, really, super sauced. CHEERS!

There it is, The List. It is however, subject to modification as I see fit because sometimes when I'm drunk I think of and do really awesome stuff, just ask me. You can tell me your top thing to do for St. Paddy's Day and maybe I'll add it to my list next year. Happy St. Me Day everybody.

Baby Prep!!!

Well, it's been a crazy-busy week, but we are making some progress I tell ya!!

To catch some of you up to speed, our condo has been on the market for 6 mos with no luck in selling. :( We placed it on the market before we got pregnant, with the hope of selling in time to start our new family in a new home. Well. The. Market. Sucks. We aren't in a terrible situation b/c I purchased a two-bedroom before we got engaged, so there is room for the baby and us. I just want a yard, and a basement, and a garage, etc. We want a home, not a house. But if we have to raise our baby for a year or so in this house, I'll be damned if we don't make it a home. The current plan is to keep it on the market for another 6 mos and then if it doesn't sell, take it off and enjoy our new family for a year, then put it back on. Sigh.

Okay, now the fun stuff. We received an antique-like Radio Flyer Red Wagon about a month back. My incredible husband decided to clean this puppy up, get rid of the rust and give it a new look. He did amazing, I am so proud of him.

Next, my Aunt and Uncle gifted us a Circa 1984 Bassett babyroom set. Complete with two dressers, (one with a mirror), a changing table and the crib. I'm in love. They are my godparents, and I babysat in the summers for my two cousins who both used this set. It's just neat all around.

NOTE** I have to brag a bit on my husband. Watching his handy-work in action, the care in his hands, and the smile on his face when doing all of these projects this week has made me so damn proud to go through life with him. I knew him while I was in a previous relationship and if I wasn't with him now, I would be so sad. I'm very lucky.

So without further ado, here are of some of the projects that we've completed this past week. I would have added some before's of the wagon, b/c it was a mess of dirt and rust and spider eggs, but blogger is saying I'm over my limit, so try to use your imagination! ~~And a little shout-out to my Brother and Sister and Parents for helping move the stuff and assemble all day yesterday. I got a pic of the 'help' in progress--and my bro set the mirror up so I could be in it too!! Aww! Also, the changing table isn't in the pictures b/c of bloggers size problem. Bummer!

Guest Blog #4 "Everyone wants something for free"

The bike shop that I work at, like most bike shops, has a set price for repairs. Be it as easy as a tube change or a full blown overhaul, which is the complete disassembly/rebuild of the fork, wheels, crank, headset, derailluers, brakes and bottom bracket. NOTE* Knowing what all of that is is not necessary to understand the rest of this story so don't get discouraged-read on.

Almost every day I will have at least 1 person come in and expect me to fix their bike for free or try to haggle me down on the price of a new bike. "Can you do any better on the price of this bike?" While it's on sale, mind you.

This is why I then constructed a price list on a 3x4 foot dry erase board. The most common response when I tell people how much their repair will cost is that they think I'm "tryin ta play dem". This gets under my skin because I am overly honest with people, I have even been known to do some pro-bono work when I think that someone is really having a crappy day or just down on their luck in general. Much to the dismay of my employer, but what he doesn't know won't hurt him. (If you read the last guest blog you're probably thinking, man this guy is going to make them go out of business). That couldn't be further from the truth, I hibernate in the winter and only give hand outs on rare occasions. Don't judge me.

I started to get tired of people trying to make me work for free and complaining when I charged them. I don't work at a pawn shop people. Try haggling with an auto shop, its not going to get you anywhere. So I decided to write on that big 'ol price board in BIG capital letters "IF YOU WANT TO PAY MORE, ASK FOR A DISCOUNT". Now, please re-read that. Ok, assuming that anyone that reads this blog has above a 3rd grade education, its pretty cut and dry.
I had a lady stand in front of me at the cash register while I was tallying up what she owed and look me in the eyes right after she read my sign and say, "Can I have a discount?" WHAT? 'Did you actually just read that sign and ask me that?', is what I thought. I slowly turned around to look at my sign in case one of my lackies played a joke on me, while keeping eye contact with her for as long as I could and I, the one who wrote the sign, re-read the sign. Nope still the same as the day I wrote it. I proceeded to read the sign to her. She, looking me straight in the eye, mind you, nodded her head and said "yeah, can I get a discount". What the shit? At this point I pictured what I must have looked like. My face showing multiple expressions; disbelief, shock, confusion-to name a few. I re-read the sign to her, (this time slower because that helps when you talk to people that don't speak english). I enunciated every word I could and used my hands as stage props. A good 10 seconds of silent eye contact, then all of a sudden "Ohhhhhhh". It finally sunk in. I then sloooowly told her the total of her repair, didn't make any sudden movements, slooowly handed her the change and sloooowly told her to "haaave a niiiice daaaay maaaaam".

Wheew not getting that 20 minutes back, ever.

Inept: My feeling this afternoon.

I'm going to begin this blog by quoting verbatim an email that I sent today to our dear friend, Nikki. ("Life of a Flat Foot Floozy" blog over there on the right)((don't yet understand the linking aspect of Blogger.))

"Oh my Gosh.

I just went to babys r us to take a gander.
I want to cry.
Mental Overload.
How in the world did you know where to begin?

I'm gonna freak out. AHHHHHH"

And that pretty much sums up my afternoon.
:)

Nikki did, however, calm my anxiety by quickly replying back offering to go with the both of us to help. And I quickly accepted. I love you, Nikki.

You know, We LOVED registering for our wedding. We got to play with the scanner thing, have eyes bigger than our wallet, and have FUN...we simply had confidence in this field. I was shopping for my home, on someone else's dime. ;) How hard could this be? It wasn't. It was fabulous.

I suppose the stress comes into play with this registry b/c it's for another little person who will NEED the junk I register for. Not WANT....NEED. I went online today to babys r us to take a look around, to get familiarized...but then I quickly clicked the X in the top right hand corner of my screen and took 3 deep breaths. Then read about Cardinals Spring Training.

At least I have my stroller picked out.
Something I need not register for as my Mom is gifting this.

Hurrumpf.

Guest Blog #3 "Winter Blues-things I do at work"

Is anyone else tired of winter? I have definitely had enough. don't get me wrong, I like the snow. I have awesome memories of sledding and getting to be off school, but I am arguably an adult now. I don't get off work because of snow. Even if I could, I wouldn't be able to go sledding, because most of the hills by our house are at schools and there's a new law stating that you have to be accompanied by a child to be on school property. *I don't know if that is actually true, but it would be weird for me to get my sled out and go sledding with the neighborhood kids.*

I'm ready to take the trash out without having to look like Randy from the Christmas Story. I'm ready to go mountain biking again. I'm ready to go camping and get out to Kelly's (sp change because of stalkers-remember?) family's lake house. Bottom line is that there is a lot more things to do when it's Spring and Summer. So, because boredom has taken it's toll, I am going to list the things that I have been doing at work to pass the time. I manage a bicycle shop, so keep in mind that we are a seasonal store, it is very slow right now. Don't judge me.

Take naps- This is a great way to pass the time. Usually I'm only good for a power nap because my ass falls asleep when I'm in my chair with my feet on the desk. Regardless, this energizes me so I can slack off to my full potential.

Ride bikes inside- Easy way to bring out the kid in you. Set up obsticles and ride. Being sure not to damage customer's bikes, or the stores bikes, because I'd have a lot of explaining to do. No matter what, can't let the owner see this happening, it is strictly against regulations.

Surf the web- This can be very time consuming, but also very frustrating. Let me explain. We still have dial-up at the shop. You see, dial-up was the thing that made that REALLY annoying noise when the computer is trying to connect to the web. It takes forever to load a page, let alone check email, and loses connection very often. I don't have that kind of time.

See if I can eat an entire PB&J sandwich w/o taking a drink- Seems impossible, right? But I have infact done it. I don't make baby sandwiches either. I'm talkin' double-decker, 3 pieces of bread PB&J's. It's awkward the one time a customer comes in as I'm in the middle of achieving the impossible.

Movie day at work- I don't do this very often, it makes me feel guilty. I bring my wifey's computer in and stop by Red Box to get a couple a flicks. Takes up half the day, and nobodys the wiser.

(And Last, but not least)
Occasionally fix a bike- I would love more work-related things to do at work, but like I said, noone is thinking about riding bikes in -7 degree windchill. I am though, getting a few bikes fixed up to donate to needy-kids with the help of our friend, (rhymes with Banana, stupid stalkers). I told you not to judge me!

Well, it's nap time, so I don't want to write my blog anymore. Have a good rest of the week, and if you have a crappy bike that you don't want anymore, let me, Kelly or Banana know so we can fix it, and give it to a kid that can use it.

Guest Blog #2 "Fibs, harmless right?"

Today on my day off I was at Schnuck's picking up Kelly's (sp change because of stalkers-remember?) pre-natal vitamins. During my 20 minute wait I ventured to the magazine and book rack. The book that caught my eye was by the girl that does the show "Chelsey Lately" and it was titled "Dear Vodka, It's Me Chelsey". First off, tell me that's not an awesome title of a book. The first chapter was about how she told a fib when she was young. This immediately sparked my usually lacking memory, about how I think telling fibs can be hilarious, with mild-to-serious repercussions.

I cannot go through every fib I have ever told, but I will narrow it down to the three that stick out most. I will start out with the one that I believe might have been my first blatant fib. I was in elementary school, about 1st or 2nd grade, (I can't remember, like I said, I don't have a good memory). One day at recess all the kids were playing, Me with myself...I mean, by myself, because I was kind of a loner in elementary school. (Very mysterious, the chicks dug it, and I had plenty of friends in my head) Well all of a sudden there was utter chaos, all the kids started running over to the fence and there stood the greatest thing that could happen at recess, a dog. Everyone was talking and saying how cool it was, and 'wondering whose dog it is'. I, with the confidence of a teeny-bopper on the red carpet, said "It's mine." Oooh! What's up? All eyes on me!! Which I believe is where I wasted my 15 minutes of fame. Then my reality came crashing down, the teacher comes over and disperses the mob, all of the smart-ass little brats say, "It's ok, It's Patrick's". At this moment, my barely formed nuts fell out of my shorts. The teacher says, "Patrick, make sure you lock your dog up so it doesn't come back anymore". I say, "Ok". Crisis averted right? Wrong. The effin dog came back the next two days, and at this point I'm balls deep in the mess, I can't say I "fibbed" so I stuck to my guns, "let it ride" the devil on my shoulder said. The next day it was obvious that the dumb-ass real owner of the dog locked it up, like a responsible pet owner, because the dog never came back. Except for a littel stress and anxiety, no body was hurt and I was eventually elected as class president. Just kidding.

Fib #2. My middle initial is W. You know how curious kids are in 6th grade, so, my future best friend asked me what the W stood for. First name that came to my mind was Wilbur. As he began laughing outloud, I was laughing internally because he obviously believed my fib. After random taunts, my friend-whose name ryhmes with Madam-eventually lost interest and the topic was never discussed again. Until we were 28 years old. Kelly mentioned my real middle name, to which my friend pointed and laughed at her, saying that I lied to her. Not True my friend. I "fibbed" to you! I have to admit that when he found out he was a little hurt that I kept it going for so long, but at the same time, it is hard to be sympathetic when you're laughing so hard you could shit yourself. The Verdict: The friend is over it and I got a really good laugh, no harm done.

Fib #3. This is by far the best one I have ever gotten people to believe. While I was in the Marine Corps, at the end of my enlistment, my platoon went on what they call, 'a float'. This means we jump on a Navy ship and go to different places in the world and show off our muscle. Before I go on, let me say that if you're not on an aircraft carrier (which we were not) there isn't anything to do on a Navy ship. This took place in the middle of September in 2001. This date might ring a bell. On our way to Africa we got the news about what had happened back home, and of course people began to panic, very understandably. Boredom is at it's extreme two weeks into a trip accross the ocean. I went to a crew chief meeting that was called, which the lower ranking Marines did not get the pleasure of attending. Perfect for my next "fib". When I got back to the platoon's bunking area (our room) I put on my most serious face and said "Hey Marines, gather around real quick, I need to pass on some news. I was just informed that we are the closest unit to Iraq, so they're sending us after those bastards" Shortly afterwards, I went to the mess hall to eat dinner. Holy Crap. When I got back I could have sworn WWIII was taking place. Guys aged 18-25 running around trying to email home, one guy crying, and others talking shit about what they were going to do in the face of battle. An extremely large amount of anxiety set in. I had no idea they would take it so seriously, after all, I'm the guy that is never serious, seriously. Word got passed to my commander that I had passed on some bad info, so a platoon formation (gathering) was held. Wonder what this could be about? After my commander gave a geography lesson, and told the Marines that there were a lot of other units a lot closer than we were, I was reprimanded. To say it nicely. I tell you what, our bathroom never looked so spotless, our hallway glistened, my push-up count increased drastically and everyone was well rested because I pulled all of the night-watch for a loooong time. Now that I think about it that was a pretty shitty thing to tell people. Oh well, what's done is done.

Guest Blog #1 "A Blog About a Blog"

Hi Guys!! Kelli again~okay it's guest blogger time! I'd like to say that every Wednesday is going to be our "guest-blogger' day, but I can not commit to that. Please forgive. So, without further ado, here's my hubby, Patrick.

A Blog About a Blog

For my first blog, I would like to issue a warning to whoever may read this. (Not that I expect anyone to). Please don't take anything I write serious because if you know me, I am rarely serious and I am not taking the blog too seriously, seriously. I am not going to intentionally, (I said intentionally) hurt feelings, insult, offend or demean anybody. I will occasionally use words that I may not know the meaning of, and may not fit into what I'm talking about. In all realization, the two people that read this, including my wife and I, are not going to find this entertaining in the least bit.

So, moving on, the reason I agreed to do this is because my wife Kelly, (I changed the spelling of her name to hide her identity from stalkers that I read about who frequent these blogs, myface or spacebook, or whatever the shit it is-but I will get to that some other time) repeatedly asked me if I wanted to be a guest poster during a football game, so eventually I agreed because I have never written a post or been on a poster. So there you have it, first blog complete.

P.S. I think blogging is stupid, no offense.